


Saki and Makio try matchmaking

by rukatsukinagatan



Category: THE iDOLM@STER, THE iDOLM@STER: SideM
Genre: Borderline crack, M/M, a mess, also sorry in advanced for lack of Asselin but his dialouge...it scares me, gets kinda ooc sometimes lol nothing too drastic tho, i dont even know what to tag this as just read it, more focus on the cafe aspect, slowburn-ish but im bad at romance, there's a coherent story though, theres really nothing about them being idols this could almost be an au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-06
Updated: 2018-05-09
Packaged: 2019-04-19 07:54:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 9,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14232738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rukatsukinagatan/pseuds/rukatsukinagatan
Summary: Saki figures out a pretty big secret of Yukihiro's, only to find there was a BIGGER SECRET, only to find that it was actually a different secret.





	1. Yukihiro Kamiya: Cake Destroyer

Yukihiro stood alone in the kitchen, as he had gone to work an hour and a half early that Monday, and stared at what he had worked on: a simple, round chocolate cake with the words “I like you” written in thin cursive with pink frosting.

He had been debating with himself for the past 30 minutes about whether this was a good idea or not. Was this too cliche? Maybe the pink was too much. What if he actually hated chocolate but Yukihiro never noticed because he’s a terrible friend!? No. It was going to be fine. Soichiro was his best friend, biggest supporter, and hopefully soon his first-

“DID GOD ALLOW YOU PLEASANT SLUMBER THIS PREVIOUS EVE?”

“AH- Ah, oh, hello Asselin…” Yukihiro sighed, “I told you not to come in here yelling.”

“He didn’t,” Saki said, “He said it normally at first, but you didn’t hear.”

“You two are here so suddenly?” Yukihiro asked, looking around but seeing no Soichiro.

“Makio Roll is completing his task of expelling the microscopic hellbugs from our human sustenance disks of holding, and as we speak, Shinonome is occupying our portal to the dark sea!”

“Roll’s cleaning the tables, Soichiro’s in the bathroom.” Saki clarified, “Cafe opens in, like, 30, we’ve been out there getting it set up.” He said, “I didn’t know you were in here making cakes though, we figured you were late.”

“Oh, yeah, I, uh, a client gave me a last minute call and I just couldn’t make them wait!”

“I guess,” Saki said, looking at the cake, “Simple enough order. Someone must be confessing~”

“YeahIguesssoisn’tthatjustsosweet.” Yukihiro said.

They heard the door open and turned to see Makio and Soichiro walk in. At that moment Yukihiro punched the cake.

He raised his fist only to bring it directly into the center of the cake.

The rest looked at him in confusion and horror, while Yukihiro just gave them a wide smile and tried to remain calm.

“Th-The cake!” Cried poor Makio, “Y-You just-!”

“It was ugly!” Yukihiro said quickly, still grinning, “I just decided.”

“You uh...You didn’t have to smash it with your bare hand.” Saki said.

“I just, um, I couldn’t have our cake expert seeing such an awful cake!” He smiled at Makio, who looked like he was about to faint.

“I think this is worse.” Saki said.

“T’was not ugly,” Asselin said, “It was not but a simple-”

“It’s gone now so please, let’s stop talking about it!” Yukihiro said.

“How bad could it have possibly been?” Soichiro sighed, “Now we have to clean up this mess…”

“I’ll get on that now!” Yukihiro said, getting up, “The rest of you finish up preparing!” Once everyone left, Yukihiro could only stare at the destroyed cake in disappointment.

This was going to be harder than he thought.


	2. Lemon-Scented Confusion

Next Monday. Same place. This time he had a danish in front of him, the words “I like you” piped in cream cheese. He figured if he panicked and destroyed it again, it would be less messy. Not that he would this time.

But lo and behold, once everyone got to work and entered the kitchen, he immediately picked up the danish and shoved the whole pastry in his mouth.  
“Is...Was that a danish?” Soichiro asked.

“...Yeah.” He nodded, barely able to swallow the mass amount of bread.

“Ah, did the daily ritual of consuming a customary forenoon collation within the same domain in which you slumber escape the mind of one mortal?”

“Yes! I was in a hurry to get here early, so I totally forgot about breakfast!” He said, giving an awkward laugh.

“Did you have to scarf it down?” Makio asked, “You hardly enjoyed it…”

“Oh, I enjoyed it,” Yukihiro said, “I just...love danishes.”

“I never knew you liked them so much.” Soichiro smiled, “Perhaps I should make them for you more often.”

“YeahthatwouldbereallygreatIwouldlovethatsomuch.” Yukihiro said.

“I hope that wasn't for a customer too…” Makio said.

“Everything’s fine guys!” Yukihiro said, “let's get the kitchen ready!”

As they were preparing the kitchen and baking some breakfast pastries, Yukihiro left to go check around the counter once more before they opened. As soon as he left, Saki turned to everyone, “Has Kamiya been acting weird to any of you?” 

“Isn’t he always kind of weird?” Soichiro asked.

“No, weirder than usual! He seems really jumpy and awkward, like he’s worried about something.”

“Maybe the health inspector’s coming?” Makio suggested.

“Oh no, we’d know if the health inspector was coming.”

“PERHAPS ONE MORTAL IS HIDING HIS UNFEIGNED EXPRESSION OF SELF BEHIND A FACADE OF SUBTERFUGE.”

“He’s hiding his feelings…?” Makio asked.

“It’s probably nothing,” Soichiro said, “Kamiya gets like this a lot actually, he stresses about things that don’t really need to be stressed over. One time when we made a birthday cake for a client’s dog, he used green frosting, but then he was sure he was supposed to use orange frosting and was freaking out as the customer walked in. It turned out they asked for green after all.” He sighed.

“This seems bigger than frosting though…” Saki sighed.

“He...he punched a cake, you know?” Makio said sadly, “And he’s been baking a lot, even outside of work.”

“Guys,” Soichiro said, “I’ll talk to him later, okay? I’m sure he just broke something or forgot to hold the door open for a lady last week. Now come on, cafe opens in five.” With that he left the kitchen.

Saki was still troubled, both worried for Yukihiro and also slightly annoyed with his erratic behavior. 

Later in the day, and it was finally lunch break, “Roll, come to the break room with me.” Saki said, “I wanna see something.”

Makio followed him to the break room, where he instantly noticed one of the lockers was opened. “Isn’t that Kamiya’s locker?”

“He left it open!” Saki said, “It was closed this morning, but when I came in here when break started, it was like that.”

“I thought Kamiya’s break wasn’t until after ours?”

“Exactly.” Saki said, “I think he really is trying to hide something!”

“Yeah! Maybe we can finally figure out why he’s acting this way.” Makio said, opening the locker.

Inside looked normal: jacket, travel books, orange juice, other Kamiya-esque things. Sitting in the locker was also a cupcake, quite fresh from the looks of it, sitting in a cute little box. On top of white frosting were the words “I like you” piped in yellow frosting.

The two of them stared at that cupcake for a minute before Saki broke the silence, “He likes someone?”

“He’s always talking about how we’re like a family, and he loves us all a lot.” Makio said, smiling.

“No, Roll,” Saki said, holding the cupcake up, “He likes someone! He has a crush on someone! That’s why he’s always baking! He doesn’t know how to tell them…”

“Wow,” He took the cupcake from Saki and looked at it, before smelling it, “Ooh, lemon! I love lemon. I wonder who he likes, I bet we’d get along!”

“Hello you tw-ACK” Yukihiro came in suddenly before freaking out. When he yelled, Makio nearly dropped the cupcake and had to lean forward to catch it, but as Yukihiro tried to grab it first, he ended up pushing Makio against the lockers, smearing the cupcake on Makio’s uniform.

“K-Kamiya!” Makio cried, looking up at Yukihiro, who looked panicked, “We’re sorry, we were just, uh…”

“We noticed your locker was open and saw a cupcake in there!” Saki said, “We thought we saw some words on it, but because they were in yellow, we couldn’t see them!”

“R-Really?” Kamiya asked.

“Yeah,” Makio said, looking down at his chest, “We certainly can’t read it now…”  
Kamiya looked down, and he was about to apologize before he realized that he was still pinning Makio to the lockers. He backed away frantically, “Sorry, sorry about that!” He said, “Just. Go to the bathroom and get cleaned up, I’ll buy you a new uniform. I have to go!” He turned and ran out.

“...Hmm…” Saki said, thinking.

“I’m gonna go to the bathr-”

“Wait!” Saki said, grabbing his arm, “Don’t you think that whole scene was really strange?”

“Yeah, he was acting weird, but it’s because he thought we discovered his secret,” Makio said, tugging a little, “Can I please go wash this off? It’s really sticky…”

“Right, right.” Saki said, letting him go. He wasn’t sure, but he really hoped he and Makio were on the same page.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aw yea really forced bad kabedon scene that no one asked for B) dw im well aware it doesn't really make sense, but when has accidental kabedon ever lol


	3. We Have to Clean the Oven

“This is grosser than I thought it’d be…” Makio said, vigorously rubbing a paper towel across all the frosting on his shirt, “And I smell like lemon…”

“Roll!” Makio heard from outside, and looked back to see the handle moving up and down frantically, he opened it and Saki nearly fell on top of him.

“Saki?”

“Why’d you lock the door if you were just cleaning off your shirt!?”

“Habit?”

“Whatever, did you...did you not have the same realization I had back there?”

“That Kamiya likes somebody?”

“That he likes you!”

Makio’s hands stopped, and he gazed in the mirror for a second before turning back to Saki, “What?”

“Kamiya like you Roll!” he gripped both his shoulders, “Think about it! When you walked in the room the first time he smashed the cake, the other time he ate the danish. That cupcake said ‘I like you,’ what if the others said that too?”

“I’m sure those weren’t meant for me,” Makio said, “He probably thought I was the person he likes.”

“But he knew that person could come into the kitchen.” Saki paused to think before looking back at Makio, “Didn’t you see how close he got to you in the break room, and then how embarrassed he got!? All because he didn’t want you seeing a cupcake!”

“Because it was a secret!”

“It was a lemon cupcake! You love lemon!”

Makio paused, “...It’s...it’s just a coincidence. It’s not like we’re that close.”

“But you're cute! Anyone could fall for you!” 

“Saki!”

He paused to think, “Why don’t we prove it then?” Saki said, letting go at last, “Try talking to him about it again. Ask him he he likes anyone and see how he reacts.”

“Fine,” He said, wiping one last smear off his uniform, “But I’m telling you, it’s not me.”

“We’ll see~”

 

Meanwhile, Yukihiro was debating the best way to die inconspicuously. He was clumsy, so he figured he could manage something. Hand in blender? Cut off arm? Choked on frosting? Fell in the oven!

The door opened, “Kamiya?” It was Soichiro, “Why is your foot in the oven? We have to clean that.”

“Oh, just...there was a fly. Must've left a window open, I'll be more careful!” He declared, awkwardly removing his foot from the appliance, “I'll clean it!”

“If you insist,” Soichiro said, “then again, it was your foot.” He said, “I'll bring you some water and spray anyway.”

When Soichiro brought the water and Yukihiro got up to get it, he ended up rising from right under the bucket, spilling water all over Soichiro and the surrounding area.

“SHINONOMEEEEE” He yelled, immediately grabbing towels, “I'm so sorry, I just..!”

“I-It’s fine,” He said, grabbing Yukihiro’s wrist, “I can go dry myself, I even have a spare uniform…” 

Yukihiro stopped dead in his tracks. He was just...pushing a towel against Soichiro’s very, very moist chest. What that meant, he wasn't sure, but he backed away quickly, hitting his elbow on the stove in the process.

“Right…”

“... I'm gonna go now…” Soichiro said, heading towards the break room. “Don't hurt yourself anymore, Kamiya.”

“Y-You too!” He hollered back (immediately regretting it). He heard the kitchen door open once again and turned to see Makio!

“Hi Kami- Woah, what happened?” He asked, looking at the giant puddle next to the oven.

“J-Just a spill.” He said, “The oven was, um, dirty, and…”

Makio still firmly believed this crush of Yukihiro’s was not on him, though he could tell he was acting suspicious, “You sure everything's fine?”

“So sure!” He said, “Say, help me clean this up, will you?”

“Of course!” He said, grabbing a towel and crouching down to start cleaning, “Oh, um, I wanted to ask you something.”

“Yes? What's on your mind?” He asked, helping to mop the giant puddle.

“Do you like anyone?”

Yukihiro stopped mopping and looked wide eyed at Makio before clearing his throat, “Whaaaaat? No, no never. I'm, uh, married to the café!”

“Right...So you're not interested in romance at all then.”

“Well, no, it's, uh, not like that. Just...Hey I think this is dry enough and look it's my break time Makio why don't you get back to waiting or whatever I'm gonna go eat   
something!” Without even taking a breath he ran out, leaving behind a very concerned Makio.

Saki, who had been right outside the entire time, poked his head in, “Doesn’t like you, huh?”

Makio said nothing, only wondered what the hell he was supposed to do now.


	4. Everyone's in on it

“I don’t know what to say…” Makio sighed as he and Saki were getting ready to go home that day, “Kamiya is really nice, and he’s super talented! But I’m not sure I really feel that way. And he’s my boss...”

“It’s fine if you don’t,” Saki said, “but how to tell him...It’d be bad if he worked on another cake and you rejected him right there, so you should tell him soon.”

“Uuuu…” Makio sulked, “I can’t just say I don’t like him, that’s so sad!”

“You can’t let him go on thinking he has a chance either!” Saki said, “Just get him alone somewhere and tell him!”

Makio thought for a second, before taking a deep breath, “Okay, I’ll tell him tomorrow, I’ll invite him to have lunch with me!”

“Who are you inviting for lunch?” Soichiro asked, startling the two as he walked in.

“Ah, Soichiro!” Makio said, “I was just gonna talk to Kamiya about something…”

“Really? What about?”

“My uh...hours. I’ve been saving up for um...cake.”

“Oh, if you say so.” He said.

Saki thought for a second before pulling Makio aside, “Maybe he can help out? He knows Kamiya the best aftera-”

“SOON RETURNING TO YOUR DOMAINS, MORTAL COHORTS?”

“Yes, same as you.” Soichiro said, putting away the last of his things, “Well, see you all tomorrow then.”

“Actually, wait Soichiro!” Saki said, “There’s something we could use your help with!”

“What’s that?” He asked, stopping to look at Saki.

“It’s about Kamiya.”

“Ah, right,” He said, “I have to be honest, I think you were right about him acting weirder than usual.” 

“Really?”

“Yeah, I walked in on him...With his foot in the oven.”

“DOTH THAT PRECOCIOUS CHIEFTAIN NOT APPERCEIVE THAT T’IS MY OBLIGATION TO EXPURGATE THE FOUL SEDIMENT THAT DEVELOPS WITHIN OUR PYRE CASKET OF SCORCHING?” Yelled Asselin.

“He was kind enough to clean it up,” Soichiro said, “Although he ended up making a bigger mess around the kitchen…”

“Yeah, I ended up having to hel- Wait what do you mean his foot was in the oven?” Makio asked.

“That bad, huh?” Saki said.

“What’s that bad?” Soichiro asked.

“See, we think Kamiya may have...A crush...On someone…”

“So even the overseer of confectionaries can incur such callow sentiments?” Asked Asselin, doing some weird chuuni pose.

“He’s only human after all, hard as that is to believe sometimes,” Soichiro chuckled, before looking back to Saki and Makio, “Now, what makes you think such a thing in the first place?”

“Well, we found a cupcake with his stuff in the break room, and it said ‘I like you’ on it.” Makio said, “We thought maybe the cake and the danish also said that.”

“I guess that would explain why he destroyed them…” Soichiro said.

“BUT,” Saki said, “He only did that when a certain someone walked in…”

“Oh,” Soichiro seemed intrigued now, “You believe it’s someone in Cafe Parade?”

“We think it’s Makio.”

Soichiro was quiet for a minute, seemingly contemplating how that was even possible, before clearing his throat, “You really think it’s him?” He pointed to Makio, who was distractedly playing with the magnets on the mini fridge, giving some of them little voices.

“Yes. It’s not just the cake thing, but it’s that he was acting really weird around him earlier, and he made the cupcake lemon,”

“Makio does like lemon…”

“Right! He also got awkwardly close to him, and then got super embarrassed!”

“The overlord with the sweets aficionado… what a fascinating dyad!” Asselin laughed.

“Well the problem is that Roll doesn’t want to be a dyad with him,” Saki said, “So we’re a little stuck on what to do.”

“There’s only one thing you can really do.” Soichiro said.

“EXTIRPATE HIS INCLINATION TOWARDS YOUR PARTIALITY BY MAKING SURE HE KNOWS NO ATTEMPT TOWARDS YOUR HEART WILL BE MET WITH CONSUMMATION, ONLY AN ADVERSE FATE.”

“That sounds a bit harsh…” Makio said

“It really is the only way though,” Soichiro said, “Why don’t you tell him over lunch tomorrow?”

“He won’t get really mad, or, like, super depressed?”

“He’ll see it as a chance to start a ‘new path in life.’” Soichiro said, waving his hand for dramatic effect, “He moves on from romantic blunders pretty quickly anyway.”

“Has Kamiya dated before?” Saki asked.

“I don’t think so. The one time I knew he had a crush on someone was in high school with this girl in our biology class.”

“Aww, how cute!” Saki mused.

“Sure. But on the day he tried to confess to her, instead of saying ‘I like you’ he pushed her down the stairs.”

“Wh-Wha…”

“He thought he was saying ‘I like you.’ Turns out his arms were moving.”

“Will I really be okay?” Asked a concerned Makio.

“Just don’t tell him near any stairs, sharp objects, or other people and you’ll probably be fine.”

“Okay…” Makio sighed, “I’ll ask him if I can have lunch with him tomorrow then, and I’ll try to...extirpate his inclinations…”

“YES THAT’S IT!”

“Do it gently though~” Soichiro said, “I know I said he can handle a lot, but he can be pretty sensitive too.”

“And remember, he is your boss, so think of Friday’s paycheck while you very gently tell him no!”

“Hehe…” 

Makio did not sleep well that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> can i just say. get ready for a really repetative theme of people walking in at really specific awkward times. like that happens so much in this story it's ridiculous it's godawful writing


	5. Chocolate-Flavored Misunderstandings

Makio had successfully asked Yukihiro to spend his lunch break with him, although he noticed that he seemed calmer than he had the last couple of days.  
“Maybe he’s planning to confess~” Saki said, nudging Makio.  
“Wouldn’t that be a bad thing in this case?” Makio sighed, picking out a sandwich he’d probably feel too bad to eat anyway, “I really don’t wanna hurt his feelings…”  
“Soichiro said he’d be fine! Kamiya always recovers, he’ll be okay,” Saki grabbed Makio’s hand one last time before he went off, “Be. Honest. Just say it short and sweet, and you’ll both be fine. I was kidding about not getting your paycheck you know~”  
“Right,” Makio said, taking a comically deep breath, “I’ll tell him I don’t feel the same, but thanks anyway!”  
“Yeah, maybe don’t thank him.” Saki said, noticing Yukihiro leaving the kitchen, “Go! Don’t keep him waiting!”  
With a push from Saki, Makio awkwardly staggered towards the table Yukihiro was seated at.  
“Ah, good afternoon, Makio!” He said, unwrapping his own lunch, “You wanted to discuss something over lunch? You’re normally not so serious.” He laughed.  
“Right, it’s not that big a deal…” No! It was a huge deal! Nonetheless, he took a seat and cleared his throat, “I just thought there was something you should know…”  
“Really now? Did something happen?”

 

“This is a bit ridiculous.” Soichiro said, crouched behind a booth along with Asselin and Saki.  
“Is your mortal mind not disquisitive as to what course our cohorts consociation will take?”  
“Don’t we know already?” He asked, “Makio told us he doesn’t like him that way…”  
“C’mon, you’re a bit curious about how this’ll go!” Saki said, munching on his own sandwich, “What if Kamiya does something super charming, and Roll changes his mind, or when Roll rejects Kamiya, he actually goes mad!”  
“He won’t, and he won’t.” Soichiro said, “And I really wish you’d eat at a table.”  
“Well I’m not gonna miss lunch break for this.” He said, taking another bite.

 

“So...This is about the other day in the break room…”  
“Ah, I see!” Yukihiro said, looking very worried all of a sudden, “I know what you're thinking about…”  
“You do?”  
“Makio, I...I’m so sorry I never got you that new uniform after I clumsily ruined yours. All over a stupid cupcake too. I can get it today if you’d like.”  
“Uh, no, it’s fine, it actually came out okay after a couple of washes.” He smiled awkwardly, “But, um, this is actually about the cupcake. Me and Saki...We saw what it said. ‘I like you.’”  
Yukihiro froze suddenly, sandwich dropping unceremoniously onto the wrapping below it, “I-I see. Wh-What do you make of that, exactly?”  
“I just wanted to...here.” Makio pulled out a cupcake of his own from under the table where he had been holding it.  
“Ooh, chocolate, my favourite!” Yukihiro took the cupcake, and read the very small, pink, very finely iced on words that adorned the cupcake, “I appreciate the feelings, and the sweets you made…” He muttered the rest of the written apology to himself before turning the same color as the words he was reading and putting the cupcake down, “Makio, I!”

 

“What’d the cupcake say?” Asked Soichiro.  
“My contrivances of aural descry could not ascertain what was being apprehended.”  
“I couldn’t hear either,” Saki said, “Maybe he wrote his rejection on a cupcake?”  
“Doesn’t that seem a bit cold?”  
“He probably didn’t really think about it.”

 

“So wait, you-?” Yukihiro stuttered some more, before taking a deep breath and looking at Makio.  
“Yeah…” Makio said quietly, hoping he wouldn’t get mad.  
Then, Yukihiro began to laugh. After a minute, Makio also awkwardly joined in, wondering if his message got across correctly. “I can’t believe you feel this way! After all this time…”  
“Yeah, I guess?” Makio agreed, though he was incredibly confused.

 

“Wait, are they actually…?” Saki leaned in closer to listen.  
Soichiro leaned in too, but then felt a tap on his shoulder, “Excuse me sir,” It was a young lady, “Do you work here?”  
“Ah, yes.” He said, getting up. She began asking questions that Soichiro was obligated to answer.

“I know how it must have looked, but I don't have those kinds of feelings towards you.”  
Makio took a huge sigh of relief, sinking in his chair and finally taking a giant bite of his neglected sandwich. “So,” He said, swallowing his food, “Who were those for then, the cakes and stuff…”  
“Right, that...I suppose since you went through all this trouble, you have a right to know, but please promise you won’t tell anyone?”  
“Sure!” Makio said, mentally excluding Saki from ‘anyone.’  
“It’s...It’s pretty embarrassing, and weird, and out of my league but...I think I really, reeaaaalllly, sort of maybe kind of definitely like...shinonome.”

 

“Okay, thanks!” The lady said before walking away.  
Soichiro sighed before crouching back down, “Why was she asking about the ingredients in each of our pastries?”  
Saki and Asselin were both staring at him, mouths agape and not really sure what to say. 

 

“R-Really?” Makio said, suddenly smiling and looking excited, “That’s kind of unexpected, but really awesome! I’m glad.”  
“R-Really? You’re glad?”  
“I’m just glad you didn’t say what I thought you were going to say…”

“What happened?” Soichiro asked, “Did I hear him say my name?”  
“NO!” They both said, “No,” Saki said, waving his hands, “He was saying, uh, something else…”  
“What’s that? Why are they both so happy?”  
“Well...”  
“IT SEEMS THE DOUBLET TRULY DID REMUNERATE EACH OTHER’S AFFECTION.”  
“...Makio does like him?” Soichiro asked.  
“Yep, turns out he changed his mind…!” Said Saki, too panicked to not go along with the lie, “Looks like they were made for each other after all!”  
“I...suppose…” Soichiro cleared his throat before getting up, “Well, I’m glad we’ve cleared that up. I guess I’ll get back to work now.” He walked into the kitchen.  
Saki looked at Asselin, “Really!? They remunerate each other’s affection!?”  
“I was unnerved!”  
“Fine, but...Wow, Soichiro, huh?”  
“They have been comrades for quite some time now.” Asselin said, chuckling.  
“Why are you laughing? This isn’t funny!” He sighed harshly, “We have to tell Makio and Ka-”  
“Why are you two on the floor?”  
“KAMIYA”  
After explaining that they were looking for Asselin’s contacts (“You wear contacts?” “WHY, YOU NEVER NOTICED?”), Saki ran to Makio, “Roll, I need to come over to your house tonight.”  
“Why?”  
“We...We kind of messed up…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if the transitions were awkward or hard to follow lol
> 
> also the formatting's different bc idk how the hell to work ao3s text box, but in my opinion it actually looks okay, so hopefully you think so too


	6. Siberia and Other Mistakes

“You what?...” Makio asked, brain seeming to refuse to believe that his friends actually just did that to him.

“Okay, well technically Asselin said it.”

“And you went with it!” He said, “Sakiiiiii what am I gonna do?”

“You won’t have to do anything,” He said, “Tomorrow we’re gonna tell Kamiya what happened, and then make him tell Soichiro what happened!”

“That seems sort of harsh…”

“It’s the only way,” Saki said, “Isn’t it worse if we let him go on this way? We need to make him get his feelings out there, and see if he has a chance with Soichiro!”

“Do you think Soichiro likes him?” Makio asked.

“Well, he’s kind of hard to read, but to be honest, he didn’t seem thrilled when we said you two confessed to each other.” He thought for a moment, “I kind of thought maybe that could mean he might like him too, but it might also be he believes your relationship is unprofessional. You never know with that guy…”

“I hope he likes him, even just a little!” Makio said, “But wait, would he hate me then?”

“Aww, who could ever hate you!” Saki said, pinching Makio’s cheek for effect.

Makio laughed, trying to relax, “I’m sure it’ll be fine, we just have to be honest!... Although I guess that was what the plan was in the first place, and then…”

“This time’ll be different! No watching from behind a booth or lying to our friends when someone confesses their feelings for them not knowing they were right there the whole time!”

“Right…”

 

The next morning Saki and Makio went to work early, and met Yukihiro, who always seems to be there first no matter how early you get there.

“Heeeeeeeey Kamiya,” Saki said awkwardly.

“Ah, you two are here early!” He said, “Excited to work I see!”

“Sure, but we actually have something we needed to tell you in private, so…”

“Ah, I see,” He said, wiping down some glasses, “Well, what’s going on?”

“See, yesterday when you were having lunch with Roll...Me, Asselin and Soichiro were watching.”

Yukihiro nearly dropped the glass he was cleaning and looked at Saki with wide eyes, “Shinonome heard what I said!?” 

“Nope! No, actually he was distracted when you said that you liked him! Although he heard his name, and- Kamiya what are you doing?”

“Booking a one-way ticket to Mexico.” He said, not looking up from his phone.

“It’s not what you think Kamiya!” Makio said, “Soichiro heard you say his name, but Saki and Asselin quickly covered it up!”

“Oh, oh thank go- Oh my gosh…” He buried his face in his hands for a second before looking back up at Saki, “What did you say?”

“...That you confessed to Roll after all and he felt the same?”

Yukihiro took a second to process what Saki said before standing up straight and heading for the kitchen.

“H-Hey, where’re you going?” 

“Oven.”

“Kamiya, no!” Saki said, “All that’s left to do is tell Soichiro the truth!”

“Saki you don’t understand! I would _actually _rather live under a bridge in rural Mexico!!”__

__“No!! You!! Wouldn’t!!!!!” He said, “You’ve taken a lot of dumb chances in life! Opening a restaurant, becoming an idol, hiring Asselin, traveling to Siberia and getting lost for a week!”_ _

__“I remember that trip…” He said, smiling._ _

__“We had to send a rescue team…” Makio said._ _

__“That’s beside the point!” Saki said, sitting on his knees on one of the barstools to be eye level with Kamiya and grabbing him by the shoulders, “All of these dumb chances, and they all turned out okay! If you can get lost in the snowy countryside of Russia and be okay, you can confess to Soichiro!”_ _

__“It’s...it’s different though,” He said, looking away from Saki and watching the sunrise from out the window, “Russia was just for a week, but I want Shinonome to be with me for years and years.”_ _

__Saki looked at him sadly, “Okay, I guess it is pretty different…”_ _

__“Hey, not to totally change the subject,” Makio piped up, “But, uh, what are we gonna do about the fact that he thinks we’re dating now?”_ _

__“Ah, I completely forgot!” Yukihiro said, “Right, if we just tell him it’s not like that…”_ _

__“He’ll wonder why me and Asselin lied in the first place.” Saki said._ _

__“Maybe we can just-”_ _

__“Good morning.” Said Soichiro as he walked in, “Oh, seems like most of us are already here. Did I miss the memo or something?”_ _

__“NOPENOMEMOWASMISSED” Yukihiro said, before clearing his throat._ _

__“Right…”_ _

__

__The day passed by very slowly for Yukihiro, each tick on the clock reminding him how time was going by, and he was just not confessing to Soichiro. So when the shop was finally closed for the night, Yukihiro immediately pulled Soichiro aside._ _

__“Hey! Before we go home for the night, could we talk alone in the break room or something?”_ _

__“Sure thing. Is something wrong?”_ _

__“No, I just wanted to tell you something…”_ _

__He led him to the break room, closing the door before taking a deep breath._ _

__“Seriously, you seem super nervous.” Soichiro said, “Did you mess something up, or…?”_ _

__“See, it’s about me and Makio…”_ _

__“Oh. Oh right, that,” He paused, shuffling awkwardly for a second, “I know, by the way.”_ _

__“Y-Y-You know!?” He asked, heart pounding harder than he thought humanly possible._ _

__“Yeah, me, Saki, and Asselin were spying on you and Makio’s lunch break, and we saw you confess.” He gave a slight smile, “Nothing to feel awkward about. I mean, if you both really like each other, than great! You were...You were really meant for each other.”_ _

__“mMmmMMMmmmm” Yukihiro was basically short circuiting at this point. How was he supposed to confess now?_ _

__“...So was that all? Just about you and Makio?”_ _

__“YepthatwasallIjust...I just thought you should know,” He laughed awkwardly, “We’re very happy together, and I’m glad you’re so supportive!”_ _

__“I suppose I always try to support you, huh?”_ _

__“Right! You’re a real bud!” He said, punching his shoulder lightly._ _

__

__Soichiro left the break room, a little dazed at Yukihiro’s jitteriness. He began heading out the door before he heard his name being called._ _

__“Soichiro!” It was Saki, “Roll had to get home quickly for something, so do you wanna walk together?”_ _

__“Ah, sure.” He said._ _

__The two headed out, “...So what were you and Kamiya talking about? I saw him take you into the break room and close the door.”_ _

__“Oh, he was just telling me about him and Makio. I told him we saw everything, but he didn’t really seem to mind.”_ _

__“What do you mean he told you about him and Makio?”_ _

__“That they’re happy together.”_ _

__Saki had to make sure he didn’t stop in his tracks, turn around, and go back to throw every kitchen appliance they had at Yukihiro. “That so? They’re happy? Together?”_ _

__Saki stopped fuming for a minute when he looked and saw Soichiro seemed a little down, “Is something wrong?”_ _

__“No, just thinking,” He said, “Him and Makio seem like a pretty unexpected couple, huh? Kamiya really is an accepting, kind person...”_ _

__“...You sound kind of like you like him.”_ _

__Any sadness left Soichiro’s face, and he went back to his usual blank expression, “He’s just my friend is all. Who wouldn’t at least admire him. I can understand why Makio changed his mind last minute I guess…”_ _

__“...Yeah that doesn’t seem a little weird to you?”_ _

__“It’s very weird, but Makio’s the kind of person who knows what he wants. I’m sure those two will be fine.” They came to an intersection, “Well, this is where we part. Unless you want me to walk you home?”_ _

__“I’m not going home first anyway, go ahead home.”_ _

__“You are quite capable of handling yourself I guess,” Soichiro smiled, “Good night then, Saki.”_ _

__“Night!” He waved sweetly. As soon as Soichiro turned the corner he bolted for Makio’s place._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this fic people meet at places early rather than stay later, bc cafe parade are all morning people i guess (also author didnt really think that through/needed a way to get soichiro to just walk in)
> 
> also AAAH it's at the point where it's starting to get all cheesy!!! Im so bad at romance so dont expect anything super "aaawww" inducing lol. i hope yall enjoy nonetheless!!! and thank you all for your kind comments!


	7. An Affair, a Sad Lunch, and Another Secret

“He what!?” Makio asked, the words making sense individually, but somehow he couldn’t comprehend what they meant strung together. Well, he knew what Saki was saying: Yukihiro literally told Soichiro that he was dating him now (and they were quite happy), and so they have yet another hole they need to dig themselves out of.  
“He doesn’t do well under pressure, I guess…” Saki sighed, “As if this week hasn't been evidence of exactly that…”  
“Well...What now?”  
“I dunno. Unless Kamiya tells Soichiro, we’re kind of stuck.”  
“Can’t one of us tell him?”  
“Then he’ll know Kamiya was lying and he’ll suspect something! We’ve caused Kamiya enough grief by meddling like this, we should really leave this to him.”  
“I hope he does it soon then,” Makio said, “I don’t want to have to pretend to date him.” He shivered, hugging his cake-shaped pillow closer, “What if we have to go on dates and stuff? Or other coupley things…!? What if he tells Soichiro we’re getting married or something? I’m too young to get married! Next we’ll be having kids, and-”  
“It won’t come to that, Roll,” Saki said, “The solution is pretty simple, if Kamiya really can’t man up and tell the truth-”  
“A one-way ticket to Mexico?”  
“Just stage a little break-up!”  
“Oh yeah, that makes more sense…” He sighed, “So we would just pretend to break-up in front of Soichiro?”  
“Yep!” Saki nodded, “Let’s get to work early tomorrow too so that we can talk to Kamiya about it.”  
“Yeah, sounds good!” Makio said, finally smiling, “This whole situation has had me so worried for the past week, I really hope we can pull it off…”  
“I think you’ll be fine, it’s Kamiya and his big mouth I’m more worried about…”

 

The next morning it was just Yukihiro, Saki, and Makio once again.  
“You want us to stage a break-up?”  
“Exactly!” Saki said, “As long as he thinks you two are dating, he’ll think you’re committed and won’t date anyone else! So, just make sure he can hear you both obviously deciding you’re not for each other, but you’ll still be friends.”  
“That’s a great idea, Saki!” Yukihiro said, “I wonder what to say though?”  
Saki thought for a moment, “Just nothing too serious, we don’t want to start a lot of drama or anything.”  
“Oh, so I can’t accuse Kamiya of having an affair?”  
“Why would you do that?”  
“I don’t know, wouldn’t it be kind of fun to dramatically point to someone and say ‘I can’t believe you’ve been having an affair!’?”  
“Who would he even be having an affair with!?”  
“Asselin?”  
“Now, now, Makio, please don’t falsely accuse me of doing something horrendous in front of the person I like maybe?” Yukihiro laughed nervously.  
“If anything, you might accidentally admit you’re having an affair…” Saki sighed.  
“I-I won’t!” Yukihiro said, “We’ll just agree we don’t really feel as though we belong together, like we’re not really that in love.”  
“Agreed!” Makio said.  
As soon as a plan was agreed, Soichiro came in for the day. He stopped and looked at the three of them, surprised to see Saki and Makio at work so early again before chuckling knowingly, “Ah, will this be commonplace now, you all coming to work together?”  
“We just needed to talk about something is all.” Yukihiro said.  
“And what’s that?”  
The three of them looked at each other, before Saki looked at Makio and Yukihiro, “Actually, these two were just talking about something…”  
“The affair?”  
“No Roll not the affair!”  
“The affair?” Soichiro asked.  
“HAHAHA Kids and their TV shows these days!” Yukihiro laughed boisterously, “Makio was just telling me about this show he started watching, and man oh man did the main character just have an affair!”  
“Oh, interesting,” Soichiro smiled,” What show, Makio?”  
“The...The Affair…?”   
“Oh, it seems to be a pretty big plot point then.”  
“I’m gonna go clean the kitchen..!” Yukihiro said, turning quickly and speed walking through the doors.  
Soichiro sighed, “How is he so lively at six in the morning? Come to think of it, he’s acting like something’s bothering him again…”  
“Yeah, I bet he has something on his mind…” Saki said, “Like maybe he’s planning something...I dunno…”  
“I suppose…”

 

Lunch break. Soichiro was eating his usual at one of the tables, which was thankfully really close to another table where he could conveniently hear a certain break-up happen.  
Yukihiro and Makio sat down, neglecting to even grab a lunch, and instead went straight to talking.  
“Doth the chieftain of the Papi Clan veritably believe this scheme will succeed?” Asked Asselin, who was spying from behind the same booth from the other day along with Saki.  
“It’s our best shot.”  
“Why can Kamiya not simply divulge the reality to Soichiro?”  
“Because that would involve talking to Soichiro about his feelings, which always seems to go terribly wrong.”  
Meanwhile, Yukihiro reached across the table to grab both of Makio’s hands, “Makio, I’m afraid I have bad news,” He spoke at a slightly louder volume, “regarding our relationship.”  
“I-Is that so?” Makio, who has never felt more awkward in his entire life (save for maybe the cupcake kabedon), asked.  
Saki and Asselin turned their heads to look at Soichiro, who seemed to be intrigued!  
“Yes...I think we both know,” he dramatically put the back of his hand to his forehead, “Our feelings have changed.”  
“Yeah...I agree.”  
“No, Makio, the problem is that we don’t agree anymore.” He took his hands back.  
“Oh, yeah, I mean I hate you!”  
“Well they haven’t changed that much…”  
“Oh, sorry.”  
“I think we both need to see other people. I don’t think I can handle someone like you, someone who is so...You…”  
“I don’t think I can handle you either,” Makio said, “In fact, you’ve been hard to handle all week…”  
“Now now now let’s not tell stories!” Yukihiro said nervously, “Point is, we both agree, in a very civil way, that we will break up. BUT! We’re still friends!”  
“Yep! Just friends, definitely not boyfriends! Well, we are boys, and we’re friends, so we’re not ‘boyfriends,’ but ‘boy friends.’ With a space!”  
“That’s exactly right!” He got up, “Good talk Makio.” Yukihiro said with a wink. Makio returned one of his own.  
“They really did it!” Saki said, “Look, Soichiro was totally watching the whole time!”  
“Yes, our trickery has worked!” Asselin cackled, “Now, for the true tale of ardency to begin!”  
“If Kamiya can get that far…”

 

The end of another work day, and Saki went to go see Makio, “You did great, Roll! I think Soichiro really believed it!”  
“I think so too!” He said happily, “I hope it works out for Kamiya now.”  
They heard the door open, and saw Soichiro walk in, “Hi Soichiro~” Saki said, “How was your day?”  
“Hm. Interesting.” He looked to Makio, “I hear you and Kamiya broke-up?”  
“Yep!” Makio said, “We decided we just needed to be friends!”  
“Yeah, Kamiya was just very enthusiastically telling me about it, actually.”  
“We’re just glad we got it off of our chests I guess?” Makio shrugged, “I’m gonna go to the bathroom real quick, then we can leave, Saki!”  
“Nope, I’m leaving you.”  
“Saki!”  
“Roll, I make the same joke every time.” He laughed, “I’ll be waiting.”  
Makio left, and Soichiro approached Saki, “That was weird, right?”  
“...Roll going to the bathroom?”  
“No, Saki,” He said, “That break-up, that whole relationship? It only lasted a few days with seemingly no build up before it, and then they just break-up because they suddenly decided they didn’t love each other anymore?”  
“I guess…” Saki said, afraid Soichiro was catching on, “Whatever it was, It’s over now though!”  
“Hm…” Soichiro seemed to be thinking deeply about something, “This may sound rude, but I’m glad it’s over.”  
“Huh?” Saki said, looking calm on the outside but freaking out on the inside, wondering if he knows.  
“It just didn’t really seem right. I’ve known Kamiya all these years, and have stuck so close to him, and yet…”  
“And yet…?”  
“I don’t know, maybe I just wish Kamiya had been a little more honest with me about whatever he was doing.”  
Saki went quiet for a moment, wondering how to word what he was thinking in a way that wouldn’t either scare Soichiro away or make him want to kill him, “I could tell it bothered you. Is it really just because your best friend wasn’t telling you something?”  
“I think that’s a part of it,” Soichiro said, “Saki, you seemed to have caught on last night.”  
Before Saki could question that, Makio came back in, “Sorry I took so long! The kitchen smelled really good, and when I walked in Asselin and Kamiya were putting cakes for tomorrow away! I just had to help out, they all looked so great! I hope I can eat a couple tomorrow!” He said happily.  
“Did you even go to the bathroom?”  
Makio fell silent, “...I’ll be right back.” With that he left the room.  
Saki sighed, although secretly he was relieved, as this would allow him to question Soichiro.  
As soon as he left, Saki looked back at Soichiro, “So, I was right about something last night?”  
“You didn’t really say it say it, but...well you said it.”  
Saki started thinking back to last night, before his own words hit him like a train, “Are you talking about when I said you talk like you like Kamiya!?”  
Soichiro chuckled, though Saki could tell even behind his facade of serenity he felt horribly awkward, “I guess I’ve really admired Kamiya for a while, but I never really thought it would bother me this much.”  
“Soichiro.” Saki dropped everything, and put a hand on his shoulder, “You need to tell Kamiya how you feel. Please.”  
“I wonder if it’s okay right now…”  
“You saw that break-up!” Saki said, “That relationship was meaningless! You’re fine to go for it!”  
“...You saw the break-up?”  
“Oh, uh...Yeah, I actually eat lunch behind that booth often...I like seeing everything.”  
“You certainly are odd, Saki.”  
Makio walked back into the room, “Okay, now I’m good!”  
“Good job, Roll.” Saki said, “I guess we should get going!” Before Saki could walk out of the room, Soichiro put a hand on his shoulder and whispered, “Don’t. Tell. Anyone.”  
Saki felt a shiver go up his spine, “Yeah of course…” he said, mentally excluding Makio from ‘anyone.’


	8. A Dark Presence in the Cafe

“He really said that!?” Makio asked, eyes wide with surprise.

“Yes! They feel the same, can you believe it?” Saki said, practically skipping down the sidewalk, “So if we can get those two together, then maybe things will finally be a little less hectic around the cafe.”

“I thought you said earlier that our meddling is what got us all in this mess in the first place?” Makio asked, “Won’t they tell each other when they’re ready?”

“You’ve been here the past week, right? Kamiya may never be ready!” He stopped in his tracks to think, “You’re right though, we ended up getting too involved, and everything got kind of messy for a minute.”

“I could’ve gotten married…”

“Right, we don’t want that,” Saki said, “So what if instead of getting directly involved, we get more indirectly involved?”

‘Oooh, we’ll make the cake this time!”

“No.” Saki sighed, “We need to be more subtle! We need to make it seem more like a sign, you know? Kamiya seems like he’d believe that sort of thing.”

“I think I might have an idea of what we could do…” Makio said.

 

The next day, Saki came into work and noticed Asselin and Makio standing at the stove. “You two got here early?” He asked, coming up behind Makio, “Are you cooking soup at seven in the morning?”

“T’is a particular concoction contrived with the sole intendment of guiding Kamiya and Soichiro on their designated path of piety!”

“Roll please tell me he’s not trying to make a love potion or something.”

“Nope, it’s just soup!” 

“STEW.”

“Just stew~”

“How is this going to guide Kamiya and Soichiro onto the ‘path of piety’?” Saki asked.

“Just abide and observe…”

“Wait and see.” Makio said, winking.

“Are you cooking, Asselin?” Kamiya asked as he walked in. Asselin immediately whipped around and pointed his ladle at him.

“KAMIYA!”

“Yes, Asselin?”

“I am...I am preparing for you an honorarium of our coalition! So do not look at it!”

“Aww, friendship soup?”

“T’IS STEW!... But yes, t’is for our……….’friendship.”

“It’s almost done, so why don’t you wait?” Makio said.

“Sure, I’ll be in the dining area then.” Kamiya said as he left to go tend outside.

 

Soon after, Asselin, Makio, and Saki came out with the stew, and Kamiya went ahead and took a seat at the counter, “I appreciate this a lot, really, but isn’t this a bit of an odd time for stew?”

“Time is a fictitious perception noted only by human mortals…” Asselin said.

“But the other day you said you’d get mad at me if I wasn’t home for dinner by six?”

‘MY PAST STATEMENTS ARE IRRELEVANT.”

“We’ll leave you to your sou- stew now,” Makio said, “Saki, Asselin, why don’t we go get some food prepared for the morning rush?”

“CERTAINLY.”

They ran into the kitchen but of course were all huddled at the door secretly watching.

Yukihiro laughed softly, “Those guys are so strange,” He said to himself, “Now, I guess if I’ve been given food I should-” He stopped when he looked into the bowl. It seemed to be a potato stew with some kind of beef broth, but the only pasta in the bowl were seven small letters:

“Tell him.”

Yukihiro got up immediately, looking around before looking back at the bowl, “C-Could it be!? My stew…”

“I think he gets it!” Makio whispered happily.

“IS HAUNTED!?”

“Oh my god.” 

Yukihiro looked around again, as if he could spot whatever demon spelt something in his stew, “I wonder if it’s some sort of bad omen...Should I call an exorcist?” He looked back at the bowl, groaning sadly, “To think Asselin put all this work into a stew, only for it to be possessed…”

Saki sighed loudly, before walking back out, “Hey Kamiya! Did I hear you talking about getting an exorcist? Because come on, Asselin isn’t that bad!

“Saki!” He said, “No, it’s just...It seems there are words written in my stew…”

“Really now?” Saki asked, “And what did they say?”

“Tell him…” Yukihiro said, shaking with unnecessary fear.

“That is weird! But why exactly is it scary?”

“Well…” He said, looking sadly to the ground, “It’s just...I know I should tell him…”

“Him? Who’s him? You need to confess something maybe?”

“I just...Saki, could you tell him for me?”

“...Depends…” Saki said, hoping they were on the same page but knowing well they weren’t.

“...Yesterday when me and Asselin were putting away cakes, Makio came to help. When he left I noticed there was one more cake left on counter, and it was the one he said was his favourite! I figured we just forgot, but when I went to put it away I dropped it...I made a second, but last night I couldn’t find the right frosting colour, so I made it green and hoped he wouldn’t notice…”

Saki had to resist the urge to take a really, really deep breath, “What colour was the cake even in the first place?”

“Pink…”

“So...So you used green?”

“I panicked!”

Meanwhile Asselin was still at the door, patting a broken Makio’s back. Saki came back after managing to calm Yukihiro down, “Well, you might get an apology and a cake later, Roll.”

“That poor cake, just...plop…”

“Perhaps there was a more fitting solution…” Asselin said.

“I think I might have that solution actually!” Saki said, “Asselin, you’re Kamiya’s roommate, right?”

“Right you are, Chief Papi…”

“Okay, I have a plan that is much less subtle, but one he won’t think is haunted!”

Saki crouched down next to them to explain.

As he got to the end of his plan, he felt a presence looming right over him. The three of them looked up and saw Soichiro, “You know, right by the   
door isn’t the best place to be scheming.”

The three of them got right back to work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> best trope = person they don't want hearing what they're saying convinently walking in
> 
> sorry this took so long, school's got me dead
> 
> im gonna upload chapter 9 too but uuh SURPRISE author can't actually write romance so it's really half-assed and awkward rip.


	9. You Don't Have to Eat All that Spaghetti Alone

As soon as Yukihiro walked into his shared apartment that evening, he immediately caught a whiff of what smelled like tomatoes and some sort of seasoning. He smiled wide, hanging his jacket on the coat rack and walking to the kitchen, “Asselin? Are you cooking dinner?”

“WHY YES,” He shouted from the kitchen, “A most delicious concoction! Blood red sauce with subtle essence of piquancy from across the seas mixed into a dish of durum ropes which have been coated in a mollified spread, with spheroids of varmint subsistence…”

“Spaghetti coated in butter sauce with tomato sauce and meatballs?”

“I suppose that’s another way to put it…”

Yukihiro smiled, “It’s been a while since we’ve sat and eaten a nice dinner together. We’ve been way too busy lately…”

“Oh, I will not be partaking in tonight’s feast,” Asselin said, “I have other activities I must attend to this night.”

“Oh, I see,” Yukihiro said, “You made so much though? I couldn’t possibly eat all that by myself.”

T’is no foreboding matter!” Asselin said, “I believe you will cope just fine.” He turned the stove off and pulled a bowl out of the cabinet, “Now, let me serve you my latest brew…” As Asselin was scooping the pasta into a bowl, he noticed the time on the stove’s digital clock, “Ah, I must part, but please, feel free to feast upon as much as your mortal hearts desire!”

“I thought it was only me tonight?”

“YES T’IS WHAT I SAID I must go now!” Asselin zoomed by Kamiya towards the door, nearly tripping and knocking over the coat rack on the way, “Enjoy!” With that he left, although he was careful not to slam the door in his haste. 

Yukihiro stood slightly dumbfounded for a moment before relaxing, chuckling softly at his incredibly odd roommate, “Well, I’d better get started on the spaghetti.” He went to turn on the TV before getting started, thinking the quiet commentary of the local cooking channel would make eating spaghetti alone a little less awkward. Although he was grateful for the dinner, he wished Asselin hadn’t gone all out if he was just going to leave before dinner.

As soon as Yukihiro sat his spaghetti on the table, he heard the doorbell ring. He laughed to himself, “He must have forgotten his keys,” He sighed, walking to the door, “Just how long did he plan on staying out?”

Yukihiro opened the door, “What did you for-Shinonome?” 

Surely enough there was Soichiro, standing at the door, “Hi, Kamiya,” He greeted, “Why do you look so confused?”

“Oh, oh no it’s just...I didn’t expect company.”

“Really? Asselin said you asked if I could come by tonight.”

“Really?” Yukihiro asked, thinking for a moment, “I don’t remember saying that…”

“So you don’t need anything?” He asked, sighing, “Really, you two need to work on your communication a little more.”

“You know what though?” Yukihiro asked, “I have spaghetti! Like, a lot of spaghetti! You haven’t eaten already, have you?”

“Actually, I haven’t,” Soichiro smiled, “You made spaghetti?”

“No, Asselin made it, though he just left,” The wind picked up slightly, reminding Yukihiro that they were still at the door, “Oh, sorry for making you stand out in the cold! Why don’t you come in?”

“Well, we’re not eating out here, are we?”

Yukihiro stepped aside to let his friend in, all the while mentally screaming “I’m going to eat dinner with Shinonome.” over and over. It wasn't like he'd never eaten dinner with his best friend before, it was more knowing well this was the best shot he had at finally confessing.

 

“Okay, he’s in!” Saki said, ducking back under the window, “I feel good about this, I think it’ll go well!”

“Are we really gonna sit out here all night?” Makio asked, “Knowing those two, this could take a while.”

“No,” Saki said, “If there’s one thing this week has taught me, it’s that spying only makes things worse,” He shook his head, “So much worse…”

“At what hour shall I make my return then? I must eventually return to my domain…”

“I dunno,” Saki said, “It's only seven right now, so we need to find something we can do for a few hours…”

“Would you like to partake in sacrificial rituals?” Asselin asked.

“Yeah!!!”

 

“Thank you, Kamiya.” Soichiro said, taking his now full bowl to the dining table, “It looks wonderful. Does Asselin cook for you often?”

“He normally cooks for the both of us, it’s unlike him to go out so suddenly.” He said, sitting across from Soichiro, “It’s lucky that he made so much anyway though.”

“I see.” The two began to eat in silence, and while Soichiro couldn’t tell how Yukihiro was feeling, he sure felt awkward. “Kamiya, I actually wanted to ask you something.”

“I-Is that so?” Asked Yukihiro, suddenly nervous.

“So you and Makio had...feelings for each other?”

Yukihiro nearly choked on his spaghetti, “S-Something like that...I guess…”

“Kamiya,” Soichiro said, “I know something was going on. You got together and then broke up all too suddenly, and even then those circumstances seemed off, considering Makio told us he didn’t like you.”

Yukihiro looked sad all of a sudden.

“...In that way…” Soichiro clarified

“Oh,” He cleared his throat, “Well, I…” He looked deep into his spaghetti, taking a deep breath, knowing now that this was his chance!!! “It was all a lie, me and Makio were never together.”

“That much was obvious,” Soichiro said, more unaffected than Kamiya would have liked, “But why did you lie about that, and even go as far as to pretend to break up over lunch?”

“Well technically it wasn’t me who lied…”

Soichiro looked up from his food, as if he just remembered, “Right, Asselin and Saki told me you two confessed to each other,” He said, “Did you get them in on it?”

“No, they said that because they knew you heard me say your name when you listened in on me and Makio.”

“Why did that matter?” Soichiro asked, spaghetti all but forgotten, focusing completely on Kamiya as if he were waiting for something.

“Well...Because I did say your name.” Yukihiro said, finally looking at Soichiro, “I had to explain to Makio why I had acted the way I did, so I told him…”

“You told him my name?”

“I told him who I liked.”

Spaghetti dinner had never been so awkward. The two had eaten past together plenty of times, whether it was meeting up after school a few years ago, or grabbing small to-go boxes from the shop across the street for their lunch break. Yukihiro would sometimes joke about ‘Lady and the Tramp-ing’ it, or how pasta was kind of romantic sometimes, but Soichiro never thought it would really have ever come to this.

”I-Is that so?”

Yukihiro wishes he could enjoy flustering Soichiro for maybe the second or third time in his life, but all he could think about was how Soichiro somehow was staring at him wide-eyed, and the spaghetti, so full of that subtle essence of piquancy from across the sea, the sea that he wished could replace his table.

“I suppose I’ve been hiding how I’ve felt for a while now,” He admitted, “It’s just so hard to gauge how you’ll react to things, you know?”

“Did you think I’d get angry?”

“I just wasn’t sure how you’d feel about your best friend liking you.” He sighed.

“Yeah, I wasn’t sure how you’d feel either…” Soichiro said, before giving a mischievous smile, “It look like I do now though.”

Yukihiro seemed to be processing that for a second, looking back at his now cold spaghetti before quickly looking back up at Soichiro, “Wait, did you just-?” Soichiro smiled again, and Yukihiro knew, because the way it was soft and for Yukihiro only, it was a smile Soichiro seldom wore, but maybe he could change that, “I’m glad….”

“Me too.” Soichiro finally picked his fork back up and poked at his meal before finally eating it, despite it being a little cold. “So are we…”

“I guess so...I think, we’re on the same page, right?”

“You still like me?”

“Of course.”

“Good then, I still like you too, so I guess we are.”

 

“FINALLY!” The three of them said, still crouched outside the window and trying to ignore the smell of burning whatever the hell Asselin found in the woods earlier.

“I’m so happy!” Makio said, “That became way more complicated than it needed to be…”

“Right?” Saki said, “but it all worked out in the end! Now we can finally go home!”

“I guess you can.”

The three of them froze immediately, and looked up to see Soichiro looming over them, leaning casually on the windowsill. 

“Heyyyy…” They said, before Asselin cleared his throat, “Forgive us, Soichiro. It seems my key had been consigned from my memory! Therefore, I needed to get through the window.”

“Why are these two with you?”

“They were aiding me!”

“So you got it open, they could go home?”

“I...suppose…”

“The window was locked Asselin.”

“Is that Asselin outside the window?” They heard Kamiya from inside the house. 

“It seems your roommate forgot his key.” Soichiro said, “He even brought Saki and Makio along.”

“Really?” He said, coming to the window, “Do they want to come in? We have plenty of spaghetti left!”

After pulling them through the window (“Why didn’t you just use your key?” “I thought he forgot his key…” “IT SEEMS I HAD IT THE WHOLE TIME HOW PECULIER”), they sat at the table, ate spaghetti, and finally told the truth about everything. 

Surprisingly, Soichiro wasn’t irritated, rather he was chuckling, “You guys did all that?”

“Yes…” They said, though Saki piped up, “But to be fair, Kamiya could have probably accidentally killed someone with how ditzy he was acting!”

“Hey…” Moped Yukihiro, though the rest were laughing as they finished their spaghetti.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We did it. I wrote and you read through possibly the dumbest fic in the idolm@ster tag
> 
> Special thanks to those who commented really nice things on every chapter!!! your comments made me really happy, and I'm glad y'all got a kick out of this mess lol
> 
> Sorry I couldn't end it better, but I'm awful with romance, so sorry for a lame conclusion to a nine chaptered slow burn fic lol

**Author's Note:**

> So. I hope this gives you an idea of what you're in for. Future chapters are longer and much more ridiculous, and the fic kind of goes no where for a while but it's all good because you should know now not to take this that seriously haha
> 
> sorry if this isnt that funny but to me and my sister this is hilarious so im sharing it with the world


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